HOW TO JOIN THE MILE HIGH CLUB

I've always wanted to join this club...anyone have some airline
tickets you wouldn't mind donating to the cause ?


EMBED-How To Join The Mile High Club - Watch more free videos

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THE WEEKEND JAM #43 PHIL COLLINS/ I DON'T CARE ANYMORE

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KARMA I HOPE YOUR PAYING ATTENTION

A little over 5 years ago my EX & I got a phone call from a friend we knew when we lived in Co. lets call her Linda, she asked if she could come stay with us for a little while to get a fresh start, she had a drug problem.

We decided it would be OK. The next day she called to say that "they" had bought "their" bus tickets and what time "they" would arrive ....it was at this point I learned what my EX knew from the start, that her boy friend, we'll call him Dan was comin with her. I had met Dan once before and he seemed like a decent guy so I didn't flip out to much. I just made it clear that there would be NO DRUGS in my house.

Dan works in concrete construction & got a job the day they got here, I was impressed. Over the next 6 months he had worked for at least 15 different company's , I was no longer impressed. About that time I came home from work a couple of hrs. earlier than expected one day only to walk in and find them smokin pot and doin crystal meth.

I told them to grab their shit and GET THE FUCK OUT and they did (side note - this is where my EX started to become my EX).

Now jump ahead about 7 months and we happen to run into them, they apologized & admitted how wrong they were for what they did & informed us that Linda was then about 2 months preggo and that they had been clean since they found out and they were doin OK.

So we kept in touch once in a while over the last 4 years.

Now skip ahead to about 9 days ago when I got a phone call from Linda, she was crying so much I couldn't understand anything she was sayin so I had her put Dan on the phone. Remember that Dan works construction, Linda "wont" work & they had fallen on pretty hard times since the economy went belly up & had been stayin with some people "tweekers" who had suddenly freaked out on them and the guy attacked Dan and told them to get out. Dan explained that they only needed a place to stay for about a week while they made arrangements to get back to Co. to his family.

At this point I would have said sorry dude the last time I offered you a helpin hand you bit it, but now they have a 4 year old child & even I wouldn't condemn a little child to livin on the street in the AZ. heat.

So I went and picked them up and on the way home I bought them a case of cheap Beer (their choice) thinkin they would make it last the week....it was gone in less than 2 days, this is where I learned that Linda had replaced her drug habit with alcoholism.

Linda at only 4' 10" after only 2 Beers begins to become a mumbling babbling bordering on psychotic loony tune but continues drinkin Beer after Beer, to suggest she stop triggers a nonstop raving rant...no thanks I'll just ignore her. To keep Linda happy Dan found someone to buy them more Beer in exchange for double the cost in food stamps, very sad I know.

Dan is now a stand up guy tryin to make a livin for his family but more so for his 4 year old son, we'll call him RJ. I don't have the Patience to be around small kids for extended periods of time but RJ I'm glad to say was an exception, in spite of his mother he is a very well behaved little boy & even had me smilin & laughin with him most of the time. Linda is like an anchor around Dan's neck holdin him back, but she's RJ's mother so he's tryin his best to make it work.

Over the last week Dan has been workin it out with a church to help them get bus tickets back to Co. and after getting the funds I took them to the bus station yesterday afternoon, when Dan went to the counter to buy the tickets they told him he was $103 short. I watched the look of shock, disbelief & desperation wash over his face.

I told him to just sit tight and I would be back shortly, I went to the bank and drew $120 out of my rent money and straight back to the bus station so they could get the tickets, I told him to keep the change so he could buy RJ some cold drinks & snacks on the trip. Dan was amazed and so very grateful, I did this partly because at this time Dan was utterly lost for what to do but mostly I must confess because there was NO WAY I was bringin that little drunk psycho loon Linda back to my house for another week while Dan tried to get the church to cough up another $103 bucks. The church by the way were the ones who called Greyhound for the ticket cost's & assured Dan they would cover the full cost.

I wish them the best luck but now they're Dan's cousins problem and Jesse & I have our house back.

Karma I hope your payin attention.

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SPORTSMAN'S DOUBLE

Sometimes your lucky day isn't !

Poke the pic to biggie size it.

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THE WEEKEND JAM #42 HUEY LEWIS & THE NEWS/ I WANT A NEW DRUG

Check out the chicks in the crowd...I'm pretty sure this
is a concert in Germany !

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THE NEW A-R 16D LOCK & LOAD

I don't know why the picture keeps disappearing but if ya Google it it's really cool.
The New DeWALT A-R 16D



It can drive a 16-D nail through a 2 X4 at 200 yards.
This makes construction a breeze, you can sit in your lawn chair and
build a fence. Just get your wife to hold the fence boards in place
while you sit back, relax with a cold Beer and when she has the boards
in the right place just fire away.

With the hundred round magazine you can build the fence with minimum
reloading. After a day of fence building with the new DeWalt rapid fire
nail gun, the wife will not ask you to build or fix anything else, probably
ever again.

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THE WEEKEND JAM #41 REO SPEEDWAGON/TAKE IT ON THE RUN

I gotta dedicate this one to my ex who disappeared Sept. 5th 2006
with my rent & utility money & NO EXPLANATION...it took me a month
to track her down, in North Carolina.

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BICYCLES & SWIMMING

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.

The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son how old are you?" "Eight", the boy replied... the man continued "Do you know what these are used for?"

The boy replied "not exactly but they aren't for me, they're for him, he's my brother, he's four. We saw on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim & ride a bike".

Right now he can't do either !

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THE WEEKEND JAM #40 WILD CHERRY/PLAY THAT FUNKY MUSIC WHITE BOY

No matter where I am or what I'm doin when I hear
this song I gotta move & groove & sing along...it's not pretty!

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I FINALLY GOT MINE

It's every straight mans dream to someday have
his very own hot sexy big tittie pole dancin stripper.

Well I finally got mine, meet Breeze (her stage name of course)

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POKE THE PIC. TO BIGGIE SIZE HER.

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